I’ve recently found myself craving a new adventure and after talking to Joe about it we’ve decided to plan a trip to Thailand.  In the last two weeks  we’ve been researching places to stay and what to do and it occurs to me that part of the fun of a trip for me is the planning and anticipation of it.  That part of it also lasts a lot longer too!  I love researching places to stay, things to see, where to eat and imagining myself there.

The process of planning and anticipating a trip can be applied to just about anything you want to do.  If you can find a goal or something to focus on in life that you’re really excited about, it gives you the energy and motivation to research it, plan it and then do it.

I would love to hear from any of you who’ve been to Thailand and have tips or recommended places you think we shouldn’t miss!

I was meeting with two women this morning who’ve just launched their own business together.  They were both laid off in the last few months and determined their best path forward was to start their own company.  They’ve both dreamed of doing it for a while and felt like now is the perfect time to do it. Last week, they were both very excited and up in the clouds because they were close to closing their first client.

When I met with them this morning, the deal hadn’t closed yet but is still in the works.  They were both a little down about it and were asking me if that’s normal.  Absolutely!  One of the things we found when we were interviewing people for Carve Your Own Road was that it always takes longer for things to happen than what you envisioned. We all want it to happen immediately, but it does take some time.  It can be extremely frustrating, but just know that everyone experiences it!

They thought that all my days now must be perfect, but I was telling them that I’m in the place right now of defining the next level for me and it all feels a little foggy at the moment.  I think that surprised them, but I explained that you’re always evolving and growing.

You may hit your goals and be very excited about it, but eventually it’s time for new goals and to evolve and grow.  I believe if you don’t choose to evolve and grow, you will be forced to.  Things are always changing, whether we want them to or not.  The pace of change has increased dramatically and I don’t think it’s going to slow down anytime soon.  It’s much better to be ahead of the curve rather than being forced to change because you’re too late.

My point is this; even if you are doing what you want to be doing…you will still have good days and bad days.  It will never be absolutely perfect, but it is so much better to have a bad day doing what you want to do rather than having a bad day doing something you despise or don’t enjoy!

I’ve been doing some radio interviews with the launch of the book and several people have commented that it seems like Joe and I have the perfect marriage.  I’m not sure there is such a thing!

We’ve been through a lot during the 14 years we’ve been married, some good, some bad - just like everyone else.  We’ve had moments where we didn’t like each other very much and our paths diverged temporarily.  But I would say mostly, we’ve had great experiences and have grown together.

Those comments got me thinking and yes, we do have a great marriage and I’m so grateful for it but it certainly isn’t perfect.  It’s work.  I think if we’re kidding ourselves to say  that marriage isn’t.  It takes dedication and commitment to communicating and giving the other person space to be fully who they are.  One of the things that has worked well for us is that we allow each other to be individuals who share a life with a common vision for what we’re creating together as a couple.

When we graduated from college, our ideas of success were fairly limited to what society taught us - get a job, move up the corporate ladder, etc. etc. and we pursued that with vigor.  Now, we’ve redefined success and what that means for each of us together and separately.  It’s a very different definition than it was 14 years ago! Today, we’re more focused on creating value and having an impact, having great experiences and living life to the fullest.

The fact that we traveled around the country together to interview people for this book and wrote the book together is tremendous.  It was a wonderful experience for both of us.  We did have some tense moments on the road, but we set some ground rules before we left that made a big difference.  We said that if one of us was having a “moment” the other person would allow them the space to have “their moment” without adding to it.  A very simple but powerful thing.  We’ve carried that over to our normal life at home and it’s pretty powerful.

I actually think that’s a good rule to live by with anyone in your life!